The Woman’s Inner Beauty

Inner beauty is a relaxed blamelessness produced by the filling of the Holy Spirit and by application of epignosis Bible doctrine from a woman’s soul. This spiritual discernment enables her to use God's grace resources to orient to the plan of God for her life.

Marriage is not a master-slave relationship. In 1 Peter 3:1-2, “be submissive” is ὑποτάσσω (hupotassō) and means to know the characteristics of, a mental attitude love, a rapport love. This is a mental attitude response to authority, to her husband as spiritual leader of the home. Her soul through Bible doctrine has an opening in every facet for the right kind of man. Dressing up the body to attract the right person is useless without the right lobe of the soul being “dressed up” in epignosis Bible doctrine. Through spiritual growth, she will obey the divine mandate to be submissive to her husband.

“In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior.” (1 Peter 3:1-2, NASB)

A right relationship and fellowship brings out the instincts of love. The wife knows instinctively what will please her husband. Being a nag, being moody, or giving him the silent treatment breaks down the marriage relationship. Instead, a wife is to have inner beauty, have a mental attitude of grace. Grace produces inner beauty.

“Behavior” is ἀναστροφή (anastrophē) and means behavior, conduct, manner of life, and way of life. This is the outward behavior that comes from her inner beauty. Through the woman’s free will in marriage, she chooses to surrender her soul and her body to one man to keep as long as they both shall live. As the Lord Jesus Christ is the protector or guardian of the soul of all believers, so the husband is the protector or guardian of his wife’s body and soul. She surrenders her soul to him. This sets up in her body a system of responses which make marriage a fantastic thing.

The Woman’s Outward Appearance

In 1 Peter 3:3-4, the man is 51% responsible for the marriage with the woman being 49% responsible. “Adornment” is κόσμος (kosmos) and means coordination of attire and grooming coupled with inner beauty. While both are important, but the emphasis is on inner beauty. What you think cannot be seen, but the result of what you think eventually becomes apparent. The emphasis is on the spiritual life.

“Your adornment must not be merely external—braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God.” (1 Peter 3:3-4, NASB)

If you depend on outer attractiveness to appeal to your husband or anyone else and exclude inner beauty, you cannot succeed in witnessing for Christ to him or to anyone else. When you stay filled with the Holy Spirit, you have an inner mental attitude of love, minus jealousy, minus hatred, and minus envy. This results in inner beauty of the soul.

In 1 Peter 3:4, the “hidden person of the heart” is the soul and it must be on all systems go. Doctrine feeds the facets of the soul. She is attractive to him and he doesn’t have to stop by the local bar to get a couple drinks to be able to face his opposite number.

“A gentle and quiet spirit” does not mean mousey. “Gentle” is πραΰ́ς (praus) and does not mean self-effacement, but mental attitude humility which is orientation to the grace of God and the plan of God with freedom from mental attitude sins. “Quiet” is ἡσύχιος (hēsuchios) and means a relaxed mental attitude minus complaining or nagging. Epignosis Bible doctrine is stored in the right lobe of the soul and applied to every situation. “Precious” is πολυτελής (polutelēs) and means of great value, great honor in divine viewpoint thinking.

Part of a woman’s inner beauty is her love for her husband. Inner beauty survives the attacks of time, while exterior beauty is corruptible and destroyed by time. The Bible tells us the emphasis should not be on the outer appearance to the exclusion of inner beauty. 1 Tim. 2:9-10.

“Likewise, I want women to adorn themselves with proper clothing, modestly and discreetly, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly garments, but rather by means of good works, as is proper for women making a claim to godliness.” (1 Timothy 2:9-10, NASB)

In 1 Timothy 2:9, “proper clothing” means well-arranged apparel, associated with “modestly and discreetly” which is a mental attitude of grace and stability of mental attitude. “Not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly garments” emphasizes what should be in her soul. In 1 Timothy 2:10, “godliness” means reverence towards the will of God and His plan for her life.

There is no prohibition of a beautiful outward appearance, but if you are beautiful on the outside and have bitterness, hatred, envy, and jealousy on the inside, there is no impact for Christ on the unbelieving spouse, or anyone else. Inner beauty is in the soul. It is what you think. Inner beauty is ageless.

A woman cannot win her unbelieving husband to the Lord apart from inner beauty, which is accomplished through the filling of the Holy Spirit and epignosis Bible doctrine in her soul. This results in a soul edification complex which is built upon residual doctrine, grace, inner happiness, relaxed mental attitude, capacity to love, and mastery of the details of life.

This is the woman’s charm, but it also belongs to all believers who are controlled by the Holy Spirit and have doctrine in their soul. The epignosis Bible doctrine in the frame of reference area of the right lobe of the soul is for application to the circumstances of life. In 1 Timothy 2:15, “if” is a third class condition and is based on volition. “In faith” refers to use of faith-rest in the spiritual life, “sanctity” refers to the filling of the Holy Spirit, and “self-restraint” is mental attitude stability.

“But women will be preserved through the bearing of children if they continue in faith and love and sanctity with self-restraint.” (1 Timothy 2:15, NASB)

Sarai to Sarah

Sarai was beautiful, but inside she had an unfulfilled soul. They couldn’t have Isaac because Abraham had to straighten out and grow spiritually. This change was effected by Bible doctrine for both Abraham and Sarai. She went from Sarai to Sarah. When this inner beauty came, Abraham fulfilled her soul and her body because he was the right man for her. As a result, Sarah became a proud and beautiful woman and was delighted and considered it a privilege to call Abraham “lord.” Why? He fulfilled her.

In 1 Peter 3:5, “former times” refers to the Old Testament. Women were the same then as now. In any historical age, a woman is a woman. “Holy women” refers to saved women who had confidence in God and who, therefore learned and applied Bible doctrine in their spiritual life. In other words, believers in the Old Testament did this. This isn’t only for the Old Testament period.

“For in this way in former times the holy women also, who hoped in God, used to adorn themselves, being submissive to their own husbands;” (1 Peter 3:5, NASB)

Her ministry was to be her husband. “Adorn themselves” means to please their husbands by making their body attractive. “Being submissive” is ὑποτάσσω (hupotassō) and means that her soul through Bible doctrine has an opening in every facet for the right kind of man.

In 1 Peter 3:6, “just as Sarah obeyed Abraham” means that Bible doctrine finally got to her. “Obeyed” is ὑπακούω (hupakouō) and means to hear and to obey. Sara heard doctrine at 90 years of age. She obeyed doctrine at 99.

“just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, and you have become her children if you do what is right without being frightened by any fear.” (1 Peter 3:6, NASB)

“Calling him lord” means she kept on calling him lord. “You have become her children” means it is something you become and you grow spiritually in Bible doctrine. As doctrine opened Sarah’s soul, so it will for women today. “Do what is right” refers to producing divine good in the spiritual life through consistent intake and application of Bible doctrine empowered by the filling of the Holy Spirit. It means literally, “do not be afraid of what will happen as a result.”

In Romans 4:17-21, Sarah had enough doctrine to know the Lord could take care of the physical impossibilities and sex then became meaningful.

“(as it is written, "A FATHER OF MANY NATIONS HAVE I MADE YOU") in the presence of Him whom he believed, even God, who gives life to the dead and calls into being that which does not exist. In hope against hope he believed, so that he might become a father of many nations according to that which had been spoken, "SO SHALL YOUR DESCENDANTS BE." Without becoming weak in faith he contemplated his own body, now as good as dead since he was about a hundred years old, and the deadness of Sarah's womb; yet, with respect to the promise of God, he did not waver in unbelief but grew strong in faith, giving glory to God, and being fully assured that what God had promised, He was able also to perform.” (Romans 4:17-21, NASB)

The Husband’s Understanding

In 1 Peter 3:7, “in the same way” is the adverb ὁμοίως (homoiōs) and means in a similar manner. The husband has responsibility in the marriage relationship besides basking in the wife’s inner beauty. The woman is called “weaker” because of her insatiable desire for the man. This makes her weaker and more vulnerable. So, in the woman, positive volition toward God provides inner beauty and positive volition toward her man provides her response.

“You husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered.” (1 Peter 3:7, NASB)

The woman was designed to complete and to compliment the man. Therefore, the woman becomes the glory of the man. “As a fellow heir of the grace of life” means every blessing is doubled in marriage. And inversely, trouble is doubled. In Genesis 3:16, the woman is given an insatiability for her right man. She has an incompleteness, an unfulfillment without him.

“To the woman He said, "I will greatly multiply Your pain in childbirth, In pain you will bring forth children; Yet your desire will be for your husband, And he will rule over you."” (Genesis 3:16, NASB)

In 1 Peter 3:7, “live with” is the present active participle of συνοικέω (sunoikeō) and means to dwell with and refers to sexual intercourse or having a sexual relationship. “In an understanding way” means to know what it is all about. The man must be thinking of the woman, her design, and must have her interests in mind. The man must have self-discipline. A man who has sex to gratify himself is the lowest kind of biped.

“Show her honor” is ἀπονέμω (aponemō) means to assign or allot from the ultimate source of oneself, to assign from yourself value to your wife. This means there is a right kind of woman for the man and a right kind of man for the woman. The rest of the men or women will not be the right fit for you.

The Lord fulfills the soul through Bible doctrine. The man fulfills the woman’s soul through marriage. “As with someone weaker” doesn’t mean weaker physically, intellectually or spiritually. This is a dative, singular, neuter, comparative meaning helpless, without strength in regard to man. “So that your prayers will not be hindered” is ἐγκόπτω (egkoptō) and means to interrupt, to impede, to constantly hinder. It is not God’s purpose that the prayers of married people be hindered. The mental attitude of the husband and wife are very important in marriage. 1 Peter 3:8-9. See category on Mental Attitude.

“To sum up, all of you be harmonious, sympathetic, brotherly, kindhearted, and humble in spirit; not returning evil for evil or insult for insult, but giving a blessing instead; for you were called for the very purpose that you might inherit a blessing.” (1 Peter 3:8-9, NASB)

Trying to Change Your Husband

Wives should never nag their unsaved husbands to quit doing something that they find objectionable. This can include getting off the bottle, quitting smoking, quitting going to the car races, quitting going to sports events, or any other activity that the husband enjoys. The old boy may think he cannot be saved unless he changes his ways to please his wife. She thinks that if she holds hell over his head that she can whip him into line. Husbands quickly become resentful of their wives over this constant disapproval. Remember, the only true change comes from within and the only agent for such change is first salvation by acceptance of the work of Jesus Christ on the Cross for their sins followed by consistent intake and application of Bible doctrine. Only the filling of the Holy Spirit can change a person from within. Rom. 12:2.

“And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect.” (Romans 12:2, NASB)

The wife’s self-consciousness should be occupation with Christ instead of self-pity and feeling sorry for herself. She may feel that she married a lemon and that things are horrible and difficult. She gets together with others who also feel sorry for themselves and they form a weep and wail club. She is minus the instincts of love. She never thinks of him. She never instinctively thinks of him.

In her vanity, she always wants him to admire her. She always wants him to approve of her. She wants him to notice her and sometimes she gets this attention by flirting with other men. She may have a narcissus complex where she spends hours standing in front of the mirror admiring herself. Then, when she has everything just right, she expects everyone else to admire her. Bible doctrine can change all of this. Occupation with Christ can knock out this self-pity and she can become the kind of woman that a man can relax around.

In the mentality or the conscious thinking part of her soul, she should respond to the man with unconditional mental attitude agapao love. She will then be minus jealousy and won’t be doing things to hurt or trying to dig. She won’t be nitpicking. She won’t be trying constantly to put him down or to compete with him. She will have a relaxed mental attitude. From the subconscious part of her soul will come the instinct of love. She may dream about him and she may instinctively think about him.

In the volition or decision making part of her soul, she will make decisions that will please her man. She will dress to please her husband. She is truly feminine now. If she cooks, she cooks things he likes. She does things he likes. She goes with him to places he likes. She might even have to learn something about football or cars. She may change some of her friends who always seem to pull her back to her old way of thinking.

In her mentality, every time she embraces her husband she isn’t thinking about some other man. She has no resentment in giving her soul and body to her husband. Now, she has true inner beauty from the Bible doctrine in her soul. Inner beauty means a woman can fulfill the role of a responding woman and delight in it, enjoy it, and revel in it instead of resenting it.

Emotion is the appreciator of the soul. She can appreciate the details of life and her husband. She has an entirely new attitude toward her man and even towards sex with him. She can become a true responder, a relaxed responder. In her free will, she wants him and may have an insatiability for him which she expresses through her emotions.

The idea of sex being a duty or a horrible grind is a destructive thing. Making excuses for avoiding sex like feigning being too tired or having a headache destroys the woman’s inner beauty. When she just puts up with sex with him means there is a big problem looming. These things really need to be discussed candidly between husband and wife.

In her conscience with the stored norms and standards, epignosis Bible doctrine flushes her soul of human viewpoint and wipes out all the old guilt complexes like sex is dirty, all the old prejudices, and allows biblical norms and standards to be superimposed on the soul. Their appreciation for each other allows them to become “one flesh” in rapport love. This makes the marriage a unique and tremendous life. Their rapport love or soul love for each other is stabilized by their unconditional mental attitude agapao love for each other. Their appreciation for each other skyrockets under these conditions. Their compatibility is evident.

Some women say; “I love this man, but I don’t like him.” In this case, you can have mental attitude love, but to like the person you need rapport love. Rapport love is gained through the spiritual growth of husband and wife. When you grow spiritually, the old sin nature is frustrated, so when one partner in marriage sins, it does not cause a response of sins in the other partner.

They do not give each other human good for human good. The lust factor is changed. The woman is not in the dumps all the time. She is no longer the clothes horse type trotting around trying to get noticed by others.

You cannot build a marriage on human good. That is what is wrong with many marriages. They are filled with human good thinking. Wives may do what they do because they feel it is their duty to do so. If there is one thing that keeps a woman from responding to a man, it is the word “duty.” She has sex with him because it is her duty. She cooks two meals a day for him because it is her duty. She has to do this or that because it is her duty. This type of thinking knocks her out. Both the man and the woman need inner beauty in their souls. A woman who is negative to Bible doctrine will never have it!

The woman who has inner beauty and is faithful to the love of her life will never make her soul or her body available to another man for fulfillment! Her love is incorruptible in the Lord. Her love is incorruptible to the man to whom she is married. The wife is fulfilled by the Lord and then fulfilled soul and body by her husband.

Results of Mental Attitude Sins

Mental attitude sins such as jealousy, bitterness, self-pity produce negative results in the woman’s soul. In her self-consciousness she may be conscious of another woman and another man. She is in self-pity. In the mentality of her soul, she is filled with mental attitude sins with no relaxed thinking.

In the volition of the soul, she makes decisions based on jealousy. She decides to hurt the man she loves, perhaps she has an affair. In her emotions, she submits to this other man to hurt another person. In her conscience, she violates the norms and standards she has had through the years. It destroys her physically and she is left with no inner beauty because of a callousness or scar tissue in her soul. She has been corrupted.

Any woman who hops from one man to another scars her soul. Point this out to your daughter to avoid any type of lascivious activity. Keep them away from dating at too young of an age. Protect your daughters. When you permit them to start dating, keep track of them and know where they are and with whom. If you are smart, you’ll have them call in at least once on the date and tell where they are and what they are doing. The mother or father or both should check out the dates she brings home. Don’t let your daughter date any guy that comes along just because she says he is the most wonderful guy in the world.

Maybe you have already made some bad decisions, have dated the wrong kind of man, and maybe slept with a few. As a believer, you start with confessing your known sins to God the Father resulting in the filling of the Holy Spirit. Make it a priority to learn Bible doctrine from a qualified pastor-teacher at a local church that teaches Bible doctrine from the original languages. Bible doctrine in the right lobe of your soul will replace the scar tissue of the soul with epignosis Bible doctrine. Bible doctrine renews your thinking, your soul.

If you are an unbeliever, it all starts with accepting Jesus Christ as your personal Savior. There is a road back and your only job is to learn Bible doctrine and learn more Bible doctrine. There is still a right kind of man for you no matter what mistakes you have made. There is nothing you have done that God's grace resources and His plan cannot fix.

If you are still single, have a love affair with the Lord and grow spiritually so you will gain more discernment that comes from the renewed soul. If you are married and your husband is an unbeliever, grow spiritually and be that walking witness of God's grace in your life. Win your husband to the Lord in this way. One of the reasons why the Word of God does not authorize women to be preachers is because when the woman has inner beauty in her soul, she is a walking pulpit wherever she may be.

The Woman’s Soul in a Biblical Relationship

The woman’s soul responds to her husband’s love and authority in a biblical marriage relationship. In the self-consciousness of her soul, she is conscious of her husband and submitting her body to him. She is not thinking of another man. In the mentality of her soul, she is thinking about her husband and is occupied with him with an unconditional mental attitude agapao love and a personal rapport love or soul love.

In the volition of her soul, she has decided to give her soul and body to her husband for guardianship. She freely made the decision to surrender her soul to him. There is a principle in psychosomatics that allows the soul to have fear, anxiety, and worry which when transferred to the body results in ulcers, diseases, and other ailments. In contrast, when unconditional mental attitude love is in the soul, she has a really wonderful relaxation which results in her loving responses to her husband.

Emotion is the appreciator of the soul. Every person has something they appreciate such as music, art, scenery, the opposite sex, cars, a football game, etc. There is a special slot in the emotions of a woman that stays open for the right kind of man, unless she has fouled it up with promiscuity. He looks good to her, he smells good to her, he feels good to her. Emotional stimulation in love can be marvelous. In her soul’s conscience, she has norms and standards, categories, etc. She has learned Bible doctrine and has grown spiritually with divine norms and standards in her soul.

The girl taking in Bible doctrine builds up divine norms and standards in her soul. She is then able to discern the good boys from the bad based on the divine wisdom in her soul. Without that Bible doctrine, she will make poor choices based on emotion, sex appeal, outward appearance, etc. When girls reach 12-16 years old, they go through the boy crazy stage and without Bible doctrine in her soul, they have no discernment about boys. They are just crazy about them.

Mothers can tell the difference between the good and bad when it comes to boys, any boy, smiling boys, small boys, and odd boys. Mothers have been burned, so they know the good from the bad. Fathers aren’t too good here as they regard all boys with suspicion.

Parents with daughters must guard and protect them well. The divine institution of marriage was designed to protect female children from their own libido, the boy crazy age, promiscuity, and the things that will destroy their soul. But when you protect them, one day they will rise up and call you blessed.