Austin Bible Church
The family is Divine Institution #3 provided for the whole human race by God and was set up for the raising and training of children. It was instituted by God and blessed. Gen. 1:28.
“God blessed them; and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth, and subdue it; and rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over every living thing that moves on the earth.”“ (Genesis 1:28, NASB)
God’s attitude toward the human race is grace. He has provided for them what they do not earn or deserve. An example of this is salvation. John 3:16.
““For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life.” (John 3:16, NASB)
Marriage, Divine Institution #2, is the institution set up by God for the establishment of a home for the family. Marriage was founded on love (a mental attitude) and so was the family, Divine Institution #3. Gen. 2:22-24; Eph. 5:28-33.
“The LORD God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man, and brought her to the man. The man said, “This is now bone of my bones, And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man.” For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh.” (Genesis 2:22-24, NASB)
“So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church, because we are members of His body. FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER AND SHALL BE JOINED TO HIS WIFE, AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH. This mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church. Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband.” (Ephesians 5:28-33, NASB)
Family Interrelationships
Children are a blessing, but often they are a headache because of failure on the part of the parents and/or children to be obedient to the instructions in the Word. Gen. 4:1; Psalms 127:3-5; Prov. 17:21; Prov. 23:24.
“Now the man had relations with his wife Eve, and she conceived and gave birth to Cain, and she said, “I have gotten a manchild with the help of the LORD.”“ (Genesis 4:1, NASB)
“Behold, children are a gift of the LORD, The fruit of the womb is a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, So are the children of one’s youth. How blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them; They will not be ashamed When they speak with their enemies in the gate.” (Psalms 127:3-5, NASB)
“He who sires a fool does so to his sorrow, And the father of a fool has no joy.” (Proverbs 17:21, NASB)
“The father of the righteous will greatly rejoice, And he who sires a wise son will be glad in him.” (Proverbs 23:24, NASB)
One of the most common problems in the home is that of rebellion and resentment which are problems of mental attitude. There is a bona fide independent use of volition on the part of a maturing adolescent, tempered with a mental attitude respect toward parents and use of good judgment.
For example, when dating a boy or girl who is a believer and/or a believer learning Bible doctrine and the parents do not like his or her personality, but the young people have compatible personalities. Therefore, in using their own volition, the boy or girl should show their mental attitude respect openly and heed their parents’ concerns.
The key to better understanding the home is the proper mental attitude of parents and children. Both parents and children must face this problem and seek a solution in order that harmony might prevail so that your children may be a lump in your throat and not a pain in your neck.
The proper mental attitude in the home and elsewhere comes through the filling of the Holy Spirit and the knowledge of Bible doctrine. The Christian way of life in the home and outside the home is a supernatural way of life, which cannot be lived apart from the control of the Holy Spirit. Rom. 8:2; Rom. 7:6.
“For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus has set you free from the law of sin and of death.” (Romans 8:2, NASB)
“But now we have been released from the Law, having died to that by which we were bound, so that we serve in newness of the Spirit and not in oldness of the letter.” (Romans 7:6, NASB)
The Responsibility of Children
The responsibility of children toward God is that they individually are responsible to make their decision regarding salvation. God desires to have a relationship with each and every one of us. Only after each of us have made this decision (only you are responsible for that decision) that we can truly be a “wise” son or daughter. Prov. 1:7.
“The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge; Fools despise wisdom and instruction.” (Proverbs 1:7, NASB)
The believing child is responsible for their relationship with the Lord. Children are to learn the Word (Bible doctrine) and use those biblical techniques to handle issues, problems, and decisions in the Christian life. For confession of sin, use 1 John 1:9. For faith-rest, use Proverbs 1:7. To build your edification complex as quickly as possible, use Ephesians 4:16.
“If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” (1 John 1:9, NASB)
“The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge; Fools despise wisdom and instruction.” (Proverbs 1:7, NASB)
“from whom the whole body, being fitted and held together by what every joint supplies, according to the proper working of each individual part, causes the growth of the body for the building up of itself in love.” (Ephesians 4:16, NASB)
Children have a responsibility toward their parents. Rebellion against parental authority is sin. Sin withholds good things from you. Jer. 5:25; Prov. 30:11.
“‘Your iniquities have turned these away, And your sins have withheld good from you.” (Jeremiah 5:25, NASB)
“There is a kind of man who curses his father And does not bless his mother.” (Proverbs 30:11, NASB)
Rebellion against parental authority may ultimately result in violent death. Prov. 30:17.
“The eye that mocks a father And scorns a mother, The ravens of the valley will pick it out, And the young eagles will eat it.” (Proverbs 30:17, NASB)
Children are commanded by God to obey their parents (as a minor) and to honor them for life. Exodus 20:12; Col. 3:20; Deut. 5:16; Eph. 6:1-4.
““Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be prolonged in the land which the LORD your God gives you.” (Exodus 20:12, NASB)
“Children, be obedient to your parents in all things, for this is well-pleasing to the Lord.” (Colossians 3:20, NASB)
“‘Honor your father and your mother, as the LORD your God has commanded you, that your days may be prolonged and that it may go well with you on the land which the LORD your God gives you.” (Deuteronomy 5:16, NASB)
“Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. HONOR YOUR FATHER AND MOTHER (which is the first commandment with a promise), SO THAT IT MAY BE WELL WITH YOU, AND THAT YOU MAY LIVE LONG ON THE EARTH. Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” (Ephesians 6:1-4, NASB)
To honor is to respect their better judgment, their instructions, their advice and their rules. To honor them is to think highly of them. Honoring is for the duration of a child’s life, obeying is not. Children should understand and perform their responsibilities toward God and their parents. The whole package is called appreciation.
Children with believing parents should be thankful for them and respond with helpfulness and cooperation. They should realize how valuable this Christian training is. Children are to obey their parents (believer or unbeliever) even if you think they are unwise. This is their responsibility. Trust the Lord to direct you and let Him show your parents that they have been unwise. Prov. 3:5-6.
“Trust in the LORD with all your heart And do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He will make your paths straight.” (Proverbs 3:5-6, NASB)
Heed parental instruction by listening to what they say and what they want you to do. Prov. 1:8; Prov. 23:12.
“Hear, my son, your father’s instruction And do not forsake your mother’s teaching;” (Proverbs 1:8, NASB)
“Apply your heart to discipline And your ears to words of knowledge.” (Proverbs 23:12, NASB)
Children must provide for aged and needy parents. 1 Tim. 5:4.
“but if any widow has children or grandchildren, they must first learn to practice piety in regard to their own family and to make some return to their parents; for this is acceptable in the sight of God.” (1 Timothy 5:4, NASB)