Austin Bible Church
Love for children is a learned love, a doctrinal love, a mature love. The priorities you must have involve a fairly complete edification complex of the soul. This includes a good understanding of grace orientation, mastery of the details of life, a relaxed mental attitude, capacity to love, and inner happiness.
Nothing can replace spiritual maturity in your soul! All of you should realize this and function daily under the grace apparatus for perception, staying out of emotional revolt, and going on a crash program of Bible doctrine that will make you spiritually self-sustaining. Then you are open to various areas of application and you recognize them. You become more discerning. You should also understand which books of the Bible are specially written for youth.
Proverbs provides Bible doctrine about the Christian walk. Ecclesiastes contains Bible doctrine about getting the right start and following through. The Song of Solomon provides Bible doctrine about Christian dating. Psalms 119 describes vividly application of Bible doctrine under extreme pressure. See category on Maximum Adversity, The Believer’s Triumph.
Bible doctrine for parent-child relationships can be found in Exodus 20, Proverbs 30:11-17, Matthew 15:4, and Ephesians 6:1-4.
""For God said, 'HONOR YOUR FATHER AND MOTHER,' and, 'HE WHO SPEAKS EVIL OF FATHER OR MOTHER IS TO BE PUT TO DEATH.'" (Matthew 15:4, NASB)
"Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. HONOR YOUR FATHER AND MOTHER (which is the first commandment with a promise), SO THAT IT MAY BE WELL WITH YOU, AND THAT YOU MAY LIVE LONG ON THE EARTH. Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord." (Ephesians 6:1-4, NASB)
Bible doctrine for very early raising can be found in 2 Timothy 3:14-17 and Proverbs 22:6.
"You, however, continue in the things you have learned and become convinced of, knowing from whom you have learned them, and that from childhood you have known the sacred writings which are able to give you the wisdom that leads to salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus. All Scripture is inspired by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, for training in righteousness; so that the man of God may be adequate, equipped for every good work." (2 Timothy 3:14-17, NASB)
"Train up a child in the way he should go, Even when he is old he will not depart from it." (Proverbs 22:6, NASB)
Daily teaching by example is important. Your children watch closely what you do and what you say under every situation. Your example should exemplify the primacy of Bible doctrine and the proper application of epignosis Bible doctrine to life’s difficult situations. Prov. 4:1-9; Psalms 119:16; Psalms 119:77.
"I shall delight in Your statutes; I shall not forget Your word." (Psalms 119:16, NASB)
"May Your compassion come to me that I may live, For Your law is my delight." (Psalms 119:77, NASB)
Parents should train their children with unconditional love and what embracing Bible doctrine can do for their long-term stability under pressure. You should train your boys in the doctrine of masculinity and your girls in the doctrine of femininity, primarily soul training not sex training. They should thoroughly understand the proper roles of husband and wife in marriage. They should be very aware of what Christian dating is about. They should understand what initiation and response mean and which sex plays each role. They should know about aggression and submission and when they can become abusive. You should thoroughly teach them the penalty of reversal of roles where the man becomes a mouse and the woman a lion. A relaxed atmosphere is very important in teaching in the home! Isaiah 3:12; Prov. 25:24.
"O My people! Their oppressors are children, And women rule over them. O My people! Those who guide you lead you astray And confuse the direction of your paths." (Isaiah 3:12, NASB)
"It is better to live in a corner of the roof Than in a house shared with a contentious woman." (Proverbs 25:24, NASB)
You should train your children through consistent temperament. Is your home a relaxed home? Do your children thoroughly understand the doctrine of emotional revolt? Eph. 6:4; James 1:19.
"Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord." (Ephesians 6:4, NASB)
"This you know, my beloved brethren. But everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger;" (James 1:19, NASB)
Your wide emotional swings when the soul is in revolt is what tears your children apart. The child doesn’t know whether you will hug them or hit them. Taking out on the child your ill will concerning someone else is a very bad example and can be very destructive. Waking up in the morning in a bad mood and conveying it to your children also serves up a very negative example. Remember, they watch what you do more than what you say.
You should train your children through consistent communication. Communicate the Word of God. Communicate from the standpoint of mutual interests. Communicate from the standpoint of allowing failure. Communicate from the standpoint of example. Deut. 6:7-9; Prov. 7; Eph. 6:1-4; Neh. 5:14-16.
""You shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up. "You shall bind them as a sign on your hand and they shall be as frontals on your forehead. "You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates." (Deuteronomy 6:7-9, NASB)
"Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. HONOR YOUR FATHER AND MOTHER (which is the first commandment with a promise), SO THAT IT MAY BE WELL WITH YOU, AND THAT YOU MAY LIVE LONG ON THE EARTH. Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord." (Ephesians 6:1-4, NASB)
"Moreover, from the day that I was appointed to be their governor in the land of Judah, from the twentieth year to the thirty-second year of King Artaxerxes, for twelve years, neither I nor my kinsmen have eaten the governor's food allowance. But the former governors who were before me laid burdens on the people and took from them bread and wine besides forty shekels of silver; even their servants domineered the people. But I did not do so because of the fear of God. I also applied myself to the work on this wall; we did not buy any land, and all my servants were gathered there for the work." (Nehemiah 5:14-16, NASB)
You should train your children to finish what they start. 1 Tim. 2:3; Neh. 2:18.
"This is good and acceptable in the sight of God our Savior," (1 Timothy 2:3, NASB)
"I told them how the hand of my God had been favorable to me and also about the king's words which he had spoken to me. Then they said, "Let us arise and build." So they put their hands to the good work." (Nehemiah 2:18, NASB)